Saturday, January 11, 2014

NFL Open Thread: Nightmare Fuel

Courtesy of Wired.com, a compendium of some of the most graphic, fascinating, and creepy images of insect-on-insect violence you'll ever want to see.

Below, an interpretation of what I expect the Seahawks to do to the Saints this afternoon:




93 comments:

zman said...

I think NO goes to the SB. In fact I thought that whoever won between NO/Philly would be the NFC champion. Remember that I'm an idiot so bet heavily on Seattle.

rob said...

i, too, am an idiot, though. this will be an interesting battle of dipshit prognosticators.

rob said...

also, happy birthday shlara!

Marls said...

Shlarapalooza!

Shlara said...

Thanks Gheorgies!

Danimal said...

Happy bday Shlara.
Please stop w New Orleans predictions.

Danimal said...

After going about 1 for 10 last week, my boy Declanimal redeemed himself with a huge day...going 4 for 8ish with a few boards, a steal, and plenty of travel free dribbling in his 5-6 bball game.

Dave said...

power outage in the gym during soccer practice. pandemonium!

Clarence said...

Soccer in the gym. Pussy!

mayhugh said...

Harvin might be out for the game.

Some really solid tackling on display early with these two defenses. I forgot what that looked like.

zman said...

Ford is pimping their foot activated tailgate really hard. Out of curiosity, does anyone see that feature and say "Oh snap, I want a Ford"?

rob said...

saints making little mistakes - costly

zman said...

Beast Mode stat graphic was designed to irk me.

mayhugh said...

Does anyone else hate the Seattle secondary? I would not root for an injury, but is it too much to ask for Earl Thomas to get a case of diarrhea before the second half?

Mark said...

Not me, Mayhugh. Big fan of Earl Thomas and Richard Sherman.

Also, Marshawn Lynch's combination of power and lateral agility is otherworldly.

mayhugh said...

Watch #24 on the Saints. He wants no part of tackling Lynch. On the TD run he basically stopped running so he would not have to take him on.

zman said...

Rob Ryan has a photo of detlef schrempf on his play sheet.

mayhugh said...

Seattle's defense is filthy. Hard to imagine the Saints driving 80 yards without a huge play.

TR said...

I don't like Seattle's secondary b/c I suspect they are all on PEDs.

zman said...

Maybe it's the same thing but I marvel at lynch's balance more than agility. He can only be tackled by being dragged to the ground. Hit him hard and like a weeble he wont fall down because he can balance himself on the edge of one toe.

rob said...

lynch's footwork is sick

TR said...

The issue w/ the Saints is they are a dome team. I don' care if Brees played at Purdue. The roster is meant for ideal conditions indoors and the defense is average at best.

Mark said...

His balance is tremendous. I love his ability to quickly jump or shuffle laterally to avoid direct contact and get extra yards.

It felt like the Saints were about to make a game of this until they were stopped on 4th down. Then Harvin makes a huge catch on 3rd down and New Orleans is in trouble.

zman said...

The bills could use a power back like lynch.

zman said...

Maybe the saints can run it down their throat with Sproles? Hahaha.

T.J. said...

Harvin might die today

TR said...

Dirty hit on Harvin.

Bigger question - does the announcing team here signify that the Kenny, Moose and Goose trio has been broken up or demoted? I thought they were the #2 team.

I like the pair doing this game. Just announce and leave out the toolish commentary (Moose) and the big-jugged worthless commentary (Goose).

zman said...

John Lynch could play for the Saints today. He looks the same as he did ten years ago.

Mark said...

He certainly looks younger than Roman Harper.

zman said...

I can't say enough bad things about these Ron Burgundy Durango ads.

Danimal said...

I dislike the Direct Tv ads more.

zman said...

They have to go for two. It's a three score game if they only get one or zero.

Mark said...

Seattle's lack of offense is coming back to bite him. I like Russell Wilson but at this point he stills more like a game manager than the elite QB he's billed as.

Mark said...

Him...them. Whatever.

zman said...

Have the saints got more than twenty yards on any one play?

zman said...

There you go.

zman said...

Why did they kick the FG? Even if they make it they need five points and they were inside seattle's 30

Clarence said...

Garrett Hartley just smirked.

Mark said...

NFL coaches are terrible at math.

Mark said...

So I guess I could be an NFL head coach.

Danimal said...

Yeah!

zman said...

Holy shit.

zman said...

I dislike Pete Carroll more than I dislike seattle's secondary.

Danimal said...

Graham will probably put this through the uprights.

zman said...

WTF?

zman said...

That's a shitty way to end a game.

Danimal said...

Holy shitballs.

rob said...

among the more anticlimatically stupid endings i can recall

Mark said...

If you had New Orleans +9.5 its been an emotional last 3 minutes. At least that's what I'd guess.

Danimal said...

Me.
Funny...I forgot I was a couple min behind live action. My "yeah" was for the last new orl td bc of wager.....the holy shitballs for the onside kick. Fascinating heh?

TR said...

Going for 1 was the right move. Colston's mistake deserves a ton of attention. An absolutely awful move.

Danimal said...

I felt the "uprights" comment was pretty humorous, to me. Graham was getting ready to kick on side, after having previously missed two field goals. I'm sure if you go back and read it, you too will find it pretty hilarious. I'll hang up now.

rob said...

colston just steps out of bounds, the saints have the ball on the 37 with 10-12 seconds left. can't even fathom what was going through his head.

TR said...

So A-Rod is suspended but will still be at spring training? That fucker needs to go away.

Danimal said...

That had to be a drawn up play where if he had the look, to throw the lateral. I can't imagine that was something he thought he'd try out.

zman said...

But he threw it forward. I gurantee that isn't what they ran in practice.

Danimal said...

Yeah....terribly executed. Just pointing out somebody likely gave him the option.

Danimal said...

Which if it works....wow. But damn....like Rob said, they had it inside the 40.
Allie is purty.

Danimal said...

I see Luck still has all of his gnarly hair.

By the way, started reading the new Johnny Carson book the other night. So far so very entertaining.

zman said...

Agreed, Colston couldn't have freelanced that play spur of the moment.

TR said...

Allie is indeed a tour La Force.

T.J. said...

Nice of Pats defense to keep this a ball game.

rob said...

man, the colts are being really aggressive. me likey.

zman said...

Someone stole $250k in cash and jewelry from Desean Jackson's house. This is why you should keep your money in a bank.

TR said...

What I am reading while sipping Red Stripe in the dark on my bed while my kids refuse to fall asleep:

http://m.worldsoccertalk.com/worldsoccertalk/#!/entry/espn-to-air-8-new-30-for-30-films-as,52d1d405025312186cb60790

Very excited for most of these.

rob said...

what's the most cash you've ever seen live? i'm hard pressed to remember ever seeing more than a grand or so.

TR said...

I put down $7K in cash for a car once.

TR said...

By "car" I mean "beautiful transvestite"

zman said...

I've taken a couple grand out of the bank to pay off my doormen etc for Christmas (another reason to avoid living in Manhattan) but that's about it.

Mark said...

My father in law is from Italy and owns a high end Italian restaurant. I've seen some large amounts at his house. Five digits.

Mark said...

He's never broken any off for me. So I'm not shit.

rob said...

how much does one pay a doorman at christmas, z?

Mark said...

Well?

rob said...

laron landry misplays a long pass? unpossible.

zman said...

I don't recall exactly but I think the doormen get $100 each but you also have to pay the porters and myriad other people who make the anthill that is a NYC hi-rise function.

T.J. said...

Pats DBs are poo poo

rob said...

andrew luck is going to break manning's records in 3 or 4 years.

T.J. said...

Which is good. Cause fuck the Patriots. (Says the guy who used TJ root for New England. Fuck it, I'm loaded up on a DayQuil / NyQuil potion)

T.J. said...

My phone autocorrects "to" to my name? Wtf

zman said...

Is KY Hilton hurt?

Lumpy said...

I remember teej in a pats shirt somewhere back in the mid 90's

zman said...

Manning's records will definitely be broken with these new rules. There's no way that a 37 year old man with his neckkbones fused together can have the best QB season of all time. The records have to fall.

zman said...

That play to the fullback worked great in Madden 93.

zman said...

Dierdorf said the NFL is a passing league and intimated that its hard to run now,or at least that there is less incentive. His next sentence was "If you run the ball enough, eventually you will break a long one." Goodbye Dan!

Mark said...

Just a reminder that LeGarrette Blount wasn't deemed a Buccaneer man by Greg Schiano and thus not good enough to play for the Bucs this year.

Lumpy said...

Is it just me or is dierdorf merging into dick enberg?

rob said...

dierdorf is doing some dadaesque shit this evening

zman said...

Dierdof huffed a bunch of glue at the half. Did anyone else laugh at the image of dierdorf sitting at his desk tryin to pronounce NE's TE's name?

Mark said...

Andrew Luck threw four picks but probably won't get killed for tonight's performance. I understand that the Colts really Aren't that talented overall four picks is BAD. But I bet most won't hammer Luck. He's the Teflon don of QBs right now.

Mark said...

I do think Luck is a beast though. Just saying he's not quite yet what he's billed as. His beard is pretty awesome though.

Squeaky said...

Lame, Hi Gheorghies!

Mark said...

It still feels early for a Hi Gheorghies...

zman said...

Indeed.